Since I was assigned as a listener for this week, I thought I would write down some of the reflection I've had. First of all, it's not like I've done much talking out loud in the class in previous weeks, except in contexts of small groups or one on one conversations. Yet, this week, I felt like talking more than usual, especially during the group reading of the second half. Is being unallowed to speak what suddenly caused this desire? Perhaps.
The group reading was easy at first; I just had to read along... yet every time there was a silence, everytime there was a break, everytime we were waiting for someone to take their turn in reading out loud, I had to refrain. Speaking is more desireable once it is taken away.
Suddenly, a thought hit me: If i'm reading, am I really listening? Am I really being attentive to the sounds words makes? I closed my eyes. But my mind kept wandering, kept getting distracted. I felt I no longer could easily ignore all the sensory cues sorrounding the words.
What is that noise I'm hearing? I looked around. Wow, I've never noticed the ventilation was so loud in here. From my spot at the entrance of the room, it was drowning out the words... was it only because I allowed it to? "Can you speak louder?", said someone. This reassured me momentarily; I wasn't alone in experiencing difficulty. The volume of the voice grew, yet, I was still noticing a myriad of other mysterious sounds. Is this the sound of a candy being unwrapped? Is this the sound of someone eating? I noticed how loud silence can be.
I re-opened my eyes, trying to see if i'd be able to follow the words better by looking at the lips. But then I started noticing how lovely the lighting looks in the Senselab at that time of day. The fading, soft natural light from the windows, with the warm highlights of the lamps in the room. Thank god the neons were off.
"Can you hear" ? Ronald asked, looking in my direction, bursting my bubble. Sidetracked again! I nodded, unsure of the proper answer.
I'm trying to?
The group reading was easy at first; I just had to read along... yet every time there was a silence, everytime there was a break, everytime we were waiting for someone to take their turn in reading out loud, I had to refrain. Speaking is more desireable once it is taken away.
Suddenly, a thought hit me: If i'm reading, am I really listening? Am I really being attentive to the sounds words makes? I closed my eyes. But my mind kept wandering, kept getting distracted. I felt I no longer could easily ignore all the sensory cues sorrounding the words.
What is that noise I'm hearing? I looked around. Wow, I've never noticed the ventilation was so loud in here. From my spot at the entrance of the room, it was drowning out the words... was it only because I allowed it to? "Can you speak louder?", said someone. This reassured me momentarily; I wasn't alone in experiencing difficulty. The volume of the voice grew, yet, I was still noticing a myriad of other mysterious sounds. Is this the sound of a candy being unwrapped? Is this the sound of someone eating? I noticed how loud silence can be.
I re-opened my eyes, trying to see if i'd be able to follow the words better by looking at the lips. But then I started noticing how lovely the lighting looks in the Senselab at that time of day. The fading, soft natural light from the windows, with the warm highlights of the lamps in the room. Thank god the neons were off.
"Can you hear" ? Ronald asked, looking in my direction, bursting my bubble. Sidetracked again! I nodded, unsure of the proper answer.
I'm trying to?
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